Chapter 5



Chapter 5:

The two women were all in black with a gun belt around their waists.  They high fived each other, getting past all the security systems was a breeze.

“This has got to be the best haul we’ve had so far,” said Mary triumphantly.  

“You bet!” smiled Bethany, “We can live on easy street for 10 years with this job.”  

As they were carefully concluding the heist, bags packed and just a few more surfaces to wipe down for prints, the Sisters heard a creaking noise in the ceiling. They tiptoed cautiously underneath the noise and examined the ceiling closely. Suddenly, the ceiling tiles gave way and a figure came tumbling to the ground in front of them.  Mary and Bethany sighed, looked at each other and said in unison, “Bulldog!”  

“That’s right ladies. Good to see you again,” Bulldog quipped with a wink.  

“The last time we saw you,” sneered Bethany, “you foiled our Rio job!!”  

“Still holding a grudge about that?” chuckled Bulldog. 

The two women went for their guns.   “Hold on” said Bulldog, “I have the drop on you!”

Even though the sisters did not see a gun on Bulldog, they knew that he probably did have the drop on them.

Mary whipped her head around furiously, “Of course we are, you idiot! The Brazilian police chased us for months!  We barely got out of South America because of you!”  

“I know,” said Bulldog matter-of-factly, “and you’re still wanted for 5,000,000 Reals.”  

“How did you find us?” shrieked Bethany, annoyed. 

“Yeah!” said Mary, “we were totally undercover!” 

“Well now, I can’t tell you that! That’s a trade secret!” grinned Bulldog, “But now it’s time for you two ladies to go to jail.” 

Nervous and scared at the prospect of capture and jail time, Bethany and Mary looked at one another, communicating without words as only sisters can. With a bounce in their step, and a glint in their eyes, they simultaneously slinked toward Bulldog and put their hands on his chest. 

“Do we really have to go to jail?” flirted Bethany, batting her lashes and pouting her mouth slightly.  

“Yeah,” answered Mary with a warm whisper, “Isn’t there something we could do, handsome?”  

“Step back, you two harpies!” shouted Bulldog decisively, “your feminine wiles will not work on me!!”  Mary and Bethany retreated quickly and turned off their charms, as if with a switch. 

“Looks like we’ll move to plan B,” muttered Bethany as she gave Mary a nudge.  

Pointing inside the wall safe Mary stated flatly, “Hey! Isn’t that a penny?” 

“Where?” said Bulldog excitedly as he rushed inside the safe, scouring the ground for lone pieces of shiny copper.

No sooner had Bulldog completely entered the safe, then Spinster Sisters swiftly slammed the safe shut and turned the dial to lock Bulldog inside. 

“What a sucker. He always falls for the old ‘penny on the floor’ ruse,” snickered Bethany.  

“Won’t he suffocate in there?” asked Mary, surprised at her genuine concern for the life of her would-be captor.  

“He has enough air in there for 29 hours,” said Bethany, “Diamond Richguy will be back by then to let him out.”  Satisfied that Bulldog would survive his temporary imprisonment, Mary picked up her bag full of loot. Bethany followed suit, and the Sisters proceeded out the back door, hopped on their horses, and rode off into the sunset. As they were riding away Bethany looked back and screamed “So long Bulldog! We always get our man!”  

Bethany and Mary shot their guns off their guns in the midnight sky and hooped and hollered all the way into the darkness of the night.

An hour later, the Sisters arrived at their secret hideout, tucked away in a secluded area 30miles from the main road. Dismounting their horses under the cold shade of a massive oak tree, the sisters walked a few hundred feet up a small knoll where a group of ferns and birch trees drank lazily from a nearby brook. Bethany moved the dense ferns aside to reveal a secret iron door, allowing Mary to punch in the 10-digit code.  As they walked down the three flights of stairs to reach their underground lair, Mary thought about how good it felt to be home amongst their familiar belongings. Persian rugs, crystal chandeliers, Picasso’s on the wall, solid gold vases and plates and goblets – the lair was elegantly furnished with the exquisite treasure they had stolen over the years.  A palace fit for a queen; in fact, two queens. 

Mary and Bethany lugged their loot over to a giant Rembrandt painting on the wall. As Mary hit a button, the painting slid upward and revealed a huge safe door. Bethany turned to dial to open the door and snickered to Mary, “I’d have loved to see Bulldog’s face when we locked him in that safe! What a moron!”

Bethany opened the door with a strong pull and when she turned her smiling face from her sister’s happy visage to the contents of the safe, all the color immediately drained from her pretty face. In the middle of the safe stood Bulldog with his ever-present smirk, and a small army of policemen, ready to arrest the Spinsters.  

“Here’s my face!” joked Bulldog, “What do you think?” The sisters instantly dropped their ill-gotten gains and stared down at the floor with tears welling in their eyes.  

“But…But…” muttered Mary. 

“Homina…homina…homina…” said Bethany incoherently.  

“Come on ladies, you can do better than that,” teased Bulldog, “You were full of intelligent quips earlier!”  

“How did you find us this time?”  A stunned Mary studdered.

“It was your own hubris.” Said Bulldog.  “When you two road away, shooting your guns, my old buddy Fred was acting as a lookout for me.  Once I got out, he told me where to go.”

The chief of police stepped toward the Sisters as two deputies proceeded to cuff them, “Alright ladies, time for both of you to go downtown.”  As the Spinsters were hauled up the three flights of stairs, past the Faberge eggs, the ivory mantelpieces, and priceless artifacts long since written off as destroyed or lost, the chief of police turned to Bulldog and said, “Thanks for the tip Bulldog. We never would have caught them without you. We’ll have our work cut out for us getting all this stuff back to the rightful owners.”   

“Happy to help, Chief. Just doing my job.” chirped Bulldog.  Halfway up the stairs, the Sister heard Bulldog shout and they stopped and looked down. He pulled something out of his shirt and extended his hand toward them saying, “Oh, by the way ladies, thanks for the penny.”

Story by Bulldog White

Written by Scott White

Edited by Jordan McMillian